Your Star
by cold-insignificant-play
Summary: ONESHOT. Set as an interlude between Prince Caspian and Voyage of the Dawn Treader. It's been three years since the Pevensies helped Prince Caspian regain control over the throne. Susan is having serious regrets and depression. Can Peter help her out?


**Your Star**

"SUSAN!" she heard her mother's voice shriek and then mutter, "Where has that girl disappeared to? SUSAN!"

17-year old Susan Pevensie pressed herself against the back panel of the wardrobe, hoping that her mother wouldn't find her in the small, dank space she was crouching in.

Suddenly the door opened, and bright light streamed in, temporarily blinding he girl.

After her eyes adjusted to her surroundings, she saw her mother towering over her like a giant.

"Susanna Georgina Pevensie, what have you been up to?" her mother's whining, shrieking voice said, "Why heaven knows how long we've been waiting at the table for you to make your magical appearing act. My goodness, look at you! All dirty and dusty!" 'Helped' wasn't the word to describe Mrs. Katie Rosie Pevensie's way of grabbing Susan up from her place. "Goodness gracious girl, why you're too old to be playing these games. Grow up!"

"Shut up" Susan's mind seemed to be saying all on its own, "Shut up, Mother."

Susan had never been rebellious, but she neither liked being pestered like her mother was doing now.

"Go and get yourself washed and clean, then head down towards dinner. Ten minutes are long enough, and Christopher-John is howling like mad.

"It wasn't ten minutes," Susan's thought as she trudged glumly to the bathroom, "Given the extra interval of time of which I was in the wardrobe before dinner, I should say they've been waiting….about 3 minutes. Yes that's it. 3 minutes."

When she entered the bathroom, she could hear Christopher-John's distant, yet distinct screaming.

"I don't want to eat that rubbish!" he wailed, "It's all horridly yucky and bleaghy!"

She smiled.

Christopher-John was the newest addition to the family, born a year after she, Peter, Edmund and Lucy had prevented the Telmarines from taking over Narnia and helped Prince Caspian reclaim his rightful place on the throne.

Prince Caspian.

Her smile quickly dropped.

Shaking off the thought of him, she tried to concentrate on working out how many years had passed in Narnian time, but the adolescent side of her brain overthrew the logical side.

How she remembered those last moments with fondness.

He looked as handsome as always, with his shoulder-length curly black hair, dark eyes and strong body.

He immediately took her in his arms, and kissed her with a lot of passion, to the awe of the onlookers and to Aslan's happiness.

But alas, that was a parting gift, and she had to step through the gateway to the real world, only taking that memory with her.

And the thought of her never being able to see him again was unbearable.

At times, she even hated Aslan for doing this to her, but what must be done, must be done. It was like magic she would never understand. Magic from the Deepest of Time.

Aslan probably did it for their own good.

She wouldn't understand that either.

Just before they had left Narnia, the lion called the two eldest Pevensies for an urgent conference. It was then when he broke the news.

"Peter, Susan," he said in his tender, yet majestic voice, "You have done me proud by serving Narnia. Of course you won't go home unrewarded, if that's what you think this conference is about. Actually, I have some news that may be both distressing and despairing to you two."

The two eldest Pevensies waited in anxiety, waiting for the bad news to wash over them like a massive flood wave. When the silence became too tense to bear, Aslan said the following scathing phrase:

"You will never be able to enter Narnia again."

For a second they both kept silent, then Pain swooped in like a sharp blade cutting through the both of them.

"Peter," Aslan said, putting a giant paw on her brother's shoulder, "You are no longer a boy. You are taking your first steps into manhood. You will be faced with your own wars, your own battles, that won't require a sword," He tapped a claw on the boy's sheath that was resting on his thigh, "Be strong and courageous, and when you feel you can't go on, remember me. I will always be with you." Aslan breathed on Peter's face, "That will keep the memory locked."

He turned to Susan.

"Susan, no more a girl, soon to be a young woman. You will also have your own issues. Including being a mother, a loving wife and a pride-giving daughter. I understand that your heart beats for someone here. But unfortunately, life is hard, and it's for the best you go the same path as your brother does." Aslan breathed on her face. "Now let us go, you have to say your farewells."

He led the siblings back to the palace's courtyard, where Lucy was waiting.

The youngest Pevensie looked hopefully at Susan, who in turn gave her a tear-streaked smile.

"Do not fret," Aslan said, "I will explain to them."

"SUSAAAAAAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!" came a whole chorus from downstairs that interrupted her train of thought.

"All right, all right, I'm coming!" she cried, rinsed her hands and stomped downstairs.

The whole family was seated at the table, Christopher-John seated at the corner, his bright blue eyes looked up expectantly at Susan as she took a seat.

"Naughty, naughty Susan!" he said, "You're a very naughty girl! Christopher-John is not naughty!"

"Hush, hush now and leave Susan alone and eat your food," her mother said.

Christopher-John's lower lip trembled and his eyes filled with tears, "But Chris doesn't like this horrid stuff," he said in a high pitched food.

"You will eat your food now or else you'll get a spanking."

"So Peter," her father said, wanting to change the subject and trying to brighten up the room's atmosphere, "When exactly are you leaving?"

"Next month," Peter said and took a bite of his piece of beef, "The Professor still needs to prepare for my arrival."

"And are you seeing forward?"

"Pretty much, it's a new experience, so I can't say for certain what it'll be like."

"So true."

All the conversations at the table went past Susan as murmurs as she picked at her food.

"Susan?" her mother asked for about four times before obtaining her attention, "Whatever's the matter, girl?"

"Nothing," Susan said and stood up, "I'm not hungry, please will you pardon me from the table," and left.

There was a shocked silence as she traipsed the stairs.

Only Christopher-John's voice broke the silence.

"Susie doesn't eat her food. She should get a spanking!"

That night, Martin Pevensie supported his wife, Katie Pevensie's frame as she wept.

"I don't understand what's going on with her," she said through tears, "She shuts herself out completely from the world outside, she doesn't talk, she doesn't eat and she keeps on hiding in that miserable wardrobe of hers. What are we doing wrong, Martin, that she's been doing this for the past three years? What?

"Hush, hush now dear, she's probably having a harsh time at school."

"Then why won't she tell us?"

"I…I don't know."

Susan was getting ready for bed, when Peter entered.

"What do you want?" she asked.

"Sue, there's no use in hiding it. I know why you've been all depressed this past while. It's Prince Caspian, isn't it?"

"No, no it isn't."

"Yes it is, come on I'm your eldest brother, the only one who understands you the best. I notice these things."

"Why do you even bother?"

"Because I care for you."

"Don't, I'm better off alone."

She swirled around violently to hide her face from her brother. She was crying.

"No you're not," he put his arms on her shoulders, "No one is."

She shrugged them off.

"Then tell me how I've survived."

"You haven't survived, you've only pulled yourself deeper into the ocean of your mind. You're drowning, and you don't want to admit it. You slap all boats away, because you want to wallow in your misery instead. Don't try to deny it, its true."

She knew the game was up.

She turned around and faced her brother.

He was still as handsome as ever, his blonde hair combed perfectly, turquoise eyes glistening and it seemed some manly features had been etched into his face. She also thought she saw some stubble on his square chin.

"It's been three years, Pete, three years. And I don't know what's happening to me. I've tried convincing myself to get over it, but it only seems as if I'm worsening. I haven't felt so strongly about anyone. But why is it taking its toll on me? Why would a boy be the source of my depression?"

"I don't know," Peter said and shrugged, "But never forget this, there are people who want to help you. All you have to do, is to open this."

He put a finger on her lips.

"But who will listen to me, they'll all think I've lost the plot."

"Then talk to your siblings, we've been with you on these adventures. We'll believe you."

"Thanks a lot. That is something I intend to keep in mind for a long, long time."

"You'd better."

He smiled and gave her a hug, then left the room, closing the door behind him


End file.
